I am ready to run away again.
I realized I am not ready to start my career yet. I got my degree and now it feels like everyone is expecting me to do something with it and, for some reason, I don’t even know if I like any of the things I could do with my degree.
I was never really passionate about anything. Not like other people are. You know, when you have something you love doing so much you could do it forever? I have hobbies. I do something and I am ecstatic about it for a while and then I find something else to be ecstatic about. And when I feel like I might need to do one thing forever I just get depressed. How weird is that?
Maybe I just haven’t found something that I really loved? Maybe it’s like with the love of your life- you can have million crushes, but you would only marry the real deal, only certain person can be the Mr Perfect.
So now that I can’t figure out the next step I am going to travel, apparently.
Basically, what happened was that a bit over a week ago I found out about this cheap travel agency, googled some stuff about it and decided to pay them a visit just to see what they are all about and what kind of trips do they offer. And now two days ago I have payed deposit to go visit Thailand and Australia for a month.
I couldn’t be more excited! I never thought I would be actually able to do something like this, but it’s happening. I am planning on volunteering with animals and learning how to dive and probably skydive as well, and it can’t come soon enough! I am a bit worried about visas, because I never had to apply for one before, but I’m sure I can handle it. I handled moving to another country, so I am hoping I can handle a trip on my own as well.
But I can’t help but feeling that I am just running again and searching for something. I don’t even know what that something is, but it’s out there and I know I don’t have it yet.